Since choosing “anchored” as my word for the year (back in January), I have done a monthly post on the subject. Thinking about not only how to remain anchored and, of course, to what I need to be anchored. Yesterday, while walking, I had some thoughts on things that anchor me (keep me from moving too far forward) that need to go. So, for the next month or so, a bit of adifferent look at “my word.”
Most of us have seen the runner (let’s say, a football player) who is racing toward the end zone – sure to make the big score. Yet, he keeps looking back. Looking over his shoulder. Whether to simply see who is gaining on him or, just maybe, being a bit too sure of himself, he continues to turn his head backwards – only to be blindsided. Stopped just short of victory. It happens. A lot. And is a great lesson for all us. Forget the lesson on gloating and/or being overconfident, the truth is looking backwards keeps us from moving forward effectively, and often brings defeat.
When I landed on the idea of being anchored at the beginning of the year, I was looking for ways to keep me from drifting. Or getting off course. I wanted to rehearse those things that keep me tethered to my faith, as well as to the savior. But, I also want to move forward. To make progress. I don’t want to be anchored in such a way that I never push away from the safety (and comfort) of the dock. The Lord, no doubt, has places (literal and otherwise) for me to go in this life and I want to go wherever He leads. Some anchors are simply weights that keep me from doing just that. That keep me stuck.
The past is one such anchor. It can be too easy for me to keep looking over my shoulder at the past. Especially the parts of the past that are filled with sweet memories. I have often said the happiest season of my life was when my children were three, five and seven (give and take a year). My oldest was a thriving second grader. My older son was a new, and adorable, kindergartner. And, during the day, I had precious one on one time with the cutest red-headed preschooler ever. In my memory, life was perfect. But, of course, life is never perfect. I just remember it that way. Not only do I enjoy rehearsing those years in my memory but I also find myself comparing other seasons to that one, but no matter how much time I (mentally) spend in that season of life, it is not coming back. It is not going to be recreated. And regularly comparing my life, and my happiness, to the past of two decades ago is not helping me today. It can steal the joy of this season and can make me fill mired. Or even stuck. I need to undo this anchor.
There are also parts of the past that aren’t as joyful, and yet I rehearse them (looking backwards) far too often. Regrets I wish I could undo. Relationships I wish I could restore. Hurts that I want acknowledged. (Many that never will be….yet I rehearse them over and over.) Repeatedly reviewing this part of the past keeps me just as stuck as the sweet memories can. Probably more.
The way to keep this vessel of my life moving forward is by looking forward. Keeping my eyes on the horizon, or on the prize, as Paul says in the Bible. I am determining not to be anchored to the past. Sweet memories are wonderful. A gift even. But I will hold them in my heart rathter than fixing my gaze on them. Unanchored…I will “press toward the mark” and all the possibilities in front of me. Who knows what is just ahead??:)